Friday, March 9, 2012


One thing and one thing only.
Harepeace, pinstriped powersuit, strongjaw, hanky, heavy keys, and a look of desperate, focused thirst. Businssmen are thirsty for one thing and one thing only. Anyways.. Every action they take, every thought they have is like a chess move in a game of Chess -- all potential repercussions exactly calculated in advance on their trusty calculators. One thing they have difficulty typing into their calculators is the equation to love. This is because their fingers are very thick and blunt, and the buttons that represent love are very tiny. However, women care about one thing and one thing only. Anyways..

Personality & Behaviour
It's time to get down to brass tax with this description of BusinesSmen. It's time to get down to business. But first, let's do lunch. When's good for you? I have a 1 o'clock so that's not good for me. I also have a 1 o'clock, so let's be friend! :) That's how business is done in the cutthroat business climate of an office building. You gotta network to stay afloat in this sea of suits.

Here's a good way of remembering what a businessmin is. Like a bee in a hive, a businessman works for a business queen named Boss, and just like a bee in a hive, he feeds his queen honey. Money rhymes with honey, ain't that funny? Bees work for a Queen; bsnsmen work for a boss who's Mean. Bees have stingers, bisinezzmen have fingers. Do you see the metapHornet? Beets me. Bees are yellow, businessmn aren't mellow. Bees have honeycombs, businessmen have haircombs that are covered in honey only by coincidence. Just use this technique whenever you need to remember what a businessman is.

Two more things: they have meetings. They have cubicles.

Businessmen are actually pretty great guys, they have some personality issues, but who doesn't these days? Businessmen are the complete package, The Office, Extras, and Life's Too Short, Peace.


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