Horsecops

A horse underneath a horsecop

Guest post by Ian Shein, whom you might find here.

Appearance
The main thing you’ll notice about horsecops is mostly how horsey they look: They seem like real cops, but upon closer inspection, you’ll notice that they are totally horses too. Their lower halves are comprised of horse lips, horse hips, horse nips, and even horse dicks. Their voices can be horse also, but that’s because most horsecops chain-smoke tobacco, like their conquistador ancestors. I think Wikipedia said it best when they said horsecops are police who patrol on horseback. Horsecops are the bastard children of horses and men, put on this planet to protect and serve.

Personality & Behaviour
Horsecops are very short-tempered and they behave like idiots. They can be lean, mean, crime-fighting machines… but only in a metaphorical sense because horsecops are actually alive like people, but they’re still below people socially and on the food chain… They are kept separate from human cops for fear of intermarriage, but even though they’re a different species than real cops, they still behave just as piggishly. Horsecops are single-hoofedly responsible for the elimination and prevention of all illegal horseplay.

Review
Horsecops are actually pretty great guys, they have some personality issues but who doesn’t these days? Horsecops are the complete package, giddyup, yee-haw, freeze asshole, Peace.

SCORE
2/17