Saturday, September 3, 2011

The Police

The highest jumping officer to date -- Deputy Shrawn
Their muscular physiques are sheathed in bullet-proof police uniforms. Polished like steel, yet delicate as a police flower, The Police are true specimens of their kind. The glocks they carry look fierce, yet proper and lawful. The Police sport savory mustaches to camouflage with the gentlemen they have to hunt down. When necessary, these patrollers get cool glasses to beat the heat. In Cali, where I'm from, an additional sun visor is of course required. This gives them the appearance of this awesome guy, but watch out because they can apprehend you or even warn you to stop. Printed on the back of their uniform is a list of laws that you must obey. Fun Tip: If you want to avoid getting caught, just keep them from turning around to see their backs. The best way to do this is to tempt them with power. Recruit a powerful friend to flex in front of The Police so you can break your favorite law or rule.

Personality & Behaviour
Two cops to a car, no more, otherwise how can the car go so fast? Plus how to arrest? Prime directive 1 for law officers is to enforce laws which may involve arresting. Use any means at your disposal- including but not limited to cuffs, harsh language, and good cop bad cop. Good cop bad cop is a classic mind trick during which one cop is really great and the other one does his job poorly, like dropping his prison keys or forgetting his wife's anniversary [Please follow us on our Pageagain. Once this technique is executed, the soon-to-be jailbird admits it and gets booked, hard. They could even arrest the President, dude. Once the Pres is arrested by a lieutenant or Deputy Shrawn, our governors and mayors will be deactivated, paving the way for anarchy at last.

The Police have a firm grip and are good at obstacle courses... They can jump nearly as high as FBI agents, but in general prefer merely to patrol. Their aim is true. Their aim is blue. Their aim is... YOU! So if you want to stay safe, don't look directly into the gun. Like in speech class, look near the forehead of the gun if you're nervous. Remember, The Police are famed sticklers. They stickler this and that, and don't be surprised when you can't do your favorite crime. They tend to hate on even the gentlest of robbers and the coolest of rapers.

Police can only be arrested by Bigger Police. But I'll leave you with one last question... What if the Bigger Cops raped?

The Police are actually pretty great guys, they have some personality issues but who doesn't these days? The Police are the complete package, protect, serve, and conquer, Peace.


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